Shelly Mateer freely admits it was Hollywood that piqued her interest in a CIA career. But underneath the superficial interest was a pull to find fulfillment. Much of her childhood was spent living overseas. She developed a flair for languages and decided a college degree in international relations would serve her well in her pursuit to join the CIA.
For seven years, Shelly applied and reapplied to the government agency. She worked in a record store to pay her bills. She worked at what is now known as Lexus-Nexus and learned how to track legislation.
By the time Shelly’s determination paid off, she was 29 years old. This, she says, was viewed as old to be a new recruit. Most of the others joining at the same time were in their early twenties. They held law degrees. She was single. She was blonde and beautiful, and she had a degree in international relations.
Almost from the first day on the job, says Shelly, she faced discrimination. At first she thought it would be a temporary event in her career. But as the years moved on it became the norm. Women gossiped about her and supervisors begrudged her relationships with superiors. Shelly did her best to be a team player on a team that largely rejected her.
“There were people that just didn’t like me and I didn’t even know who a lot of these people were. I had no idea. I would just hear it would trickle down later or even while it was happening. I had no idea.” The “cubicle warriors,” as Shelly refers to them, would have open discussions in the middle of meetings about things like her hair color. It was the kind of bullying that would seem more apt to occur in middle school than in what is one of the most powerful government organizations on earth.
Shelly stuck with her career and the random transfers or setbacks to her goals within it. She forged friendships with a small group of colleagues who became her core circle, and she seized every opportunity to have fun along the way.
In her book, Single in the CIA, Shelly unabashedly talks about some of the long term relationships and some of the casual flings she had with others in the CIA.
In this interview, Shelly shares those stories as well as her insight on current events through the lens of her experience. She compares and contrasts the cultures of nations she’s lived in to the American culture, and offers her insight on how to live life on your own terms, regardless of limits or expectations others place upon you.
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